Repaid The Money But Relationship Suffering

Claudia borrowed money from her parents and paid it back, but the relationship is strained. How can she repair the relationship?

QUESTION: Claudia in Florida borrowed money from her parents and paid it back, but the relationship is strained. How can she deal with this? Dave explains why he thinks time may be the best healer.

ANSWER: If you've paid back the money, I guess it's the fact that you paid it back slowly or weirdly that strained the relationship. If they're going to hold a grudge on that, then the relationship is going to stay strained. Generally speaking, what happens is that time begins to heal these things. Now that they've been paid back, over time they'll become more and more forgiving for the fact that you paid late payments or you didn't pay them properly or whatever. But if you paid it back, that's all you can do for the relationship. Past that, it's their choice on when they want to be nice about the fact that they got their money back. Suffice it to say, you've learned your lesson. Borrowing money from your parents—or, for those of you who are parents, loaning money to your kids—would fall under the heading of "stupid." You're asking for this trouble. Don't do that. Ever.