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Ask Dave

Hopeless And Spending Like It

One listener is having her marriage severly affected by her husband's immaturity. They need Dave's help.

QUESTION: A listener complains by email that her husband won’t stop spending money because he doesn’t ever see them getting out of debt. How does she communicate that this is affecting their marriage? By saying just that, Dave says.

ANSWER: Say out loud that you need a man, not a little boy. Every time you act hopeless and throw up your hands saying that we can’t win, I lose respect for you. I need a grown-up around here, so be one before you destroy our marriage. He believes the lie that the little man can’t get ahead. He needs to step and go through the difficult task of completing the task of changing your lives. This can be turned around, but it has a lot to do with if you can believe it can be turned around.