Don't Marry If You Can't Commit

John is engaged, but he wants to know what Dave thinks about getting a prenuptial agreement. Dave tells John he wouldn't marry her if he couldn't commit wholly to her.

QUESTION: John in Florida is engaged, but he wants to know what Dave thinks about getting a prenuptial agreement. Dave tells John he wouldn't marry her if he couldn't commit wholly to her.

ANSWER: I wouldn't do one. If you're not willing to commit your life and everything that it means to her, don't marry her.

I will tell you for the sake of our other listeners that that's the stand I've taken for years. After working with some extremely wealthy people, I have one caveat to that. If there's $2 million or $3 million or more involved, then you may want to think about a prenup in that case. In your case, you have just some generally good assets, $200,000 each give or take, and I wouldn't. The reason for the difference is not snobbishness and not that the principle works in one place but not the other. As I have worked with wealthy people, most of them are very normal, but they attract some wackos. And some of their kids are wackos. They don't always have good judgment about who's around them. They have good judgment on almost everything else in their lives.

If I passed away, my wife would be worth several million dollars. I would suggest to her that she needs a prenup. That's actually in my instructions in my estate. It's not a mandatory thing in the estate plan or something, but it's just good common sense, because she would be a target. My younger daughter got married about a year ago, and my other daughter just got engaged. They both stand—in both cases—to inherit some wealth but don't have any now, and they don't have prenups. I want them to love the person more than they love money.

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