The Free Dinner That Wasn't

Diane from Facebook asks how Dave feels about the free trip and dinner while listening to pitches for a timeshare. Is it playing with fire? Dave says yes, and then some.

QUESTION: Diane from Facebook asks how Dave feels about the free trip and dinner while listening to pitches for a timeshare. Is it playing with fire? Dave says yes, and then some.

ANSWER: No, it’s playing with fire while sitting in a puddle of gasoline. That’s what it is. It’s stupid.

By the way, the place you stay and the dinner is not that good anyway. How cheesy are you? Really. Honestly. This is not like five-star accommodations here.

There is nothing good—zero, zippo—about a timeshare. Nothing. It has no redeeming value. It is one of the few consumer products that has a 97% dissatisfaction rate. It’s almost impossible to find someone who’s glad they bought one. You want to spend an entire day of your vacation putting up with some twerp that couldn’t get a job working somewhere else arm-twisting you so you get a free dinner or a place to stay? How stupid and cheap are you? No, it’s a dumb idea. Stay away from it—really.

Here’s the problem: You sit there long enough, you get lulled to sleep, you’ll wake up owning one of those things, and then you’ll be calling me. You can’t get rid of it. Nobody wants the stupid things. You’re stuck. And you did it to yourself. No. No. No. Timeshares suck. Stay away from them. Gosh, I hope I wasn’t unclear.