QUESTION: Margaret in Chicago and her husband owned a small business, and Margaret was clueless about its operations. He used up their savings and borrowed money, didn’t pay his employees, and stole from a family member’s account. Now, they have $300,000 in debt and are being sued. Dave thinks he gets one more chance, and then it’s a deal breaker.

ANSWER: It’s hard to build a relationship with a liar. You need good marriage counseling, and if he refuses to go with you, then that’s a deal breaker. He’s a liar and a thief. You’re going to have to make a life somewhere else under the direction of a counselor if he won’t get engaged in rebuilding trust with you in the counselor’s office.

It’s a deal breaker. This guy is on his last thread. Give him one more chance under the direction of your counselor to come to the table with you and save this marriage.

QUESTION: Dennis in San Francisco and his wife have a full-time ministry. Two years ago, when the economy crashed, offerings dropped, and they’ve had a 75% icome drop. How does he get the income back up to keep this ministry going? Dave says Dennis needs to take care of his own household first.

ANSWER: Continue looking at the ministry as a business. Stephen Covey says where there is no margin, there is no ministry. You need to keep this financially palatable for your family, because you need to take care of your own household first. You must first do that; otherwise this needs to be a part-time gig. Either that or you change your business model.

Companies that put sound systems or pews in churches don’t do it on a love offering. They have to be paid or they can’t stay open. You went into this ministry because you are an evangelist, and one with a great twist. But the way you get paid has to change, because you are not able to make your deal.

There are companies that book Christian speakers, so you might try that. You may be in a season where you do something else on the side and temporarily scale back this ministry until these churches recover. Your cheese got moved, and your method of doing business has to at least temporarily change because it’s not working. It either changes from the way you get paid or some supplemental income. You might create a formal donor list as if you were going on the mission field to gather support. That’s outside your comfort zone, but you don’t have any choices.

QUESTION: Dan in Grand Rapids has a 27-year-old daughter who is living in Korea. She married a poor man from Ghana, and Dan has never met him. His daughter wants Dan and his wife to sponsor her husband to move to the U.S. Is this a good idea? Dave talks through it with Dan.

ANSWER: Poor is not a disqualification. From another country is not a disqualification. The fact that he married your daughter says one good thing about him. The question is what does the sponsorship involve? What are the risks? How is this man going to approach honoring the risks that you take?

If you’re financially able to sponsor him, the question becomes is he able to work and make sure you never have to do that? Is he the type to do that? Here’s what you’re doing: Even though he’s already married your daughter, in this case, you’re interviewing this guy for a job. Does he have the character, the work ethic, the initiative to come to this country and appreciate the freedoms that are at his fingertips and become somebody? Or is he going to be somebody who’s going to become a parasite on the back of his father-in-law? That’s what you have to figure out before you sign off on that form.