by Candace  at July 30 2009 8:59 AM

At our house we have started using the term. . .WWDD? This has helped each of us to check the other one. It's a non aggressive way for us to say, hey, did you even think about that decision or are you wiling to pay the stupid tax following it? It's working!

by Scott  at October 21 2009 1:24 PM

I am at the end of a FPU in church. My wife has never made the effort to attend. We worked on the first budget together and set how much goes where. It was tight but I said to see how it went and we could adjust next month. Last month she complete blew off even attempting to stay on budget. This month she refuses to even talk about any budget or about finances at all. I don't know what to do. I know our budget is tight on all levels. I know Dave says that seperating accounts and bills is death to a marriage, but what do you do if one spouse is spending at a rate that will put you 100's if not 1000's negative every month?

by jay  at October 30 2009 2:50 PM

I'm at the end with scott. My husband lets me make all the financial decisions. We both were spenders at one point until I looked up and saw debt but no money. Now, I have to fix it because i was in charge of the money. and guess what he's not trying to get on board by not spending. It is impossible to make another person do something. Now what?

by Ashley  at November 05 2009 10:24 AM

Our marriage may not be perfect but we are both pretty good w/ $. I am more of the pay debt off and he is more the lets have a big savings incase. We enjoy separate money so we each get a certain amount of spending money each month then the rest is in joint checking. I think Dave has great ideas but very extreme.. We have no CC debt but enough in school loans (we're just 25). we want to pay our debt down but still enjoy life as we do so.

by Georgia  at November 12 2009 8:34 AM

No doubt about it: communicating about money is a challenge, but the work and time has been worth it for my husband and me. I did the budget alone for years, then would go ballistic when he spent "off plan." Now we do it together and I follow Dave's guidelines. I'm the nerd, so I show my husband the budget and SHUT UP! The rule is he has to make one change; he can't abdicate responsibility, because it's a joint venture. A couple of other ground rules that have helped: (1) absolutely no talk about money in bed and (2) have budget discussions in a neutral, pleasant environment. We usually end up in a coffee shop, buying the cheapest beverage on the menu! Maybe the nerd can also create the budget and propose a time to meet: "Hey, honey, I'm working on the budget for next month. Would Friday at 7 p.m. be a good time for us to discuss it? We could take an hour and go to Starbucks..."

by thom  at November 16 2009 8:16 PM

I ended up ending my relationship. She just wasnt going to change and basically told me it was her way or the highway. I looked at the situation and realized that it was going to end sooner or later if she wasnt going to change. That was 10 months ago and i hear she has lost her job, car, apartment, and suffering from severe depression. Hurts to know how bad off she is but its all the things i mentioned could happen.